Friday, September 14, 2007

Phoney Faces

Think of a person you know who acts one way when he or she is with a group of people, but acts very differently when you’re with him or her in private. Describe how this person acts in public or private, and explain why you think he or she wears such a mask sometimes-why not be yourself at all times?

To Bring to Class Monday: Act one contains many quotes that address the idea of false appearances. Find two quotes, put them into your own words, and explain how they relate to the theme of appearance v. reality.

39 comments:

Jennifer said...

I do know one particular person whose personality changes drastically. Around me, she is herself and acts a little crazier than she does around other people. But, when she is with friends that she feels less comfortable around, and especially adults, she acts much older and serious. It does get annoying, because I am one of the only people who know both of her personalities, and I do not fully understand why she acts as different as she does around other people. I think she does this because she feels uncomfortable in a lot of situations and likes to keep to herself more, which is understandable.
I personally think that everyone can act one way sometimes and act another way at other times. It depends on who we are around, and then our personalities change to match the situation and the people we are around.

roser said...

In middle school, a friend of mine would constantly be two-faced. For almost everyone she had a different "mask". For me the mask would show her as a funny, gossip-girl. For another, she would be serious and mean. Another phoney attitude was when she would almost completely ignore me, with certain friends. It was really fake and most people started noticing it, which was bad for her because people would remember her for acting in her schizophrenic ways.

She probably only wore all the masks to be accepted, because she wasn't secure enough with being herself.

Maddie T. said...

I had one friend who would be super crazy and hyper but around guys and other "popular girls" she would get all serious, laughing only a little, and trying to act sexy. Only me and my friends noticed but it was still really weird to see that. It was mainly because of her big insecurity involving being "popular" and getting a boyfriend.

matthewg said...

I have met many people who put on masks in public and are entirely different when there aren't unfamiliar people around. Many of these people are insecure about who they are, and act shy to hide it. Other people are perfectly normal, but try to be cool in public and fall in with the wrong crowd. Still a few others that I have met have a unique ability to act as if they have a different personality whenever they want, however this isn't a mask, because they aren't trying to hide anything or fit in. It can be pretty interesting to watch these people, and most of them make very good actors, from what I've seen in school plays.

catherinec said...

I’ve actually met two or three people that wear a mask, not only around me, but their other friends too. They act extremely friendly and social around me, but when they get together with other people, they act like someone else that is entirely opposite from themselves. It’s almost as if their trying to impress the other crowd. Personally I think that these people wear a mask in order to make new friends that probably are “popular” or “cool”. Most of the time, they often share no interests what so ever and their personalities are completely opposites. This mask that they wear often is what hides the differences.

Anonymous said...

The person I know that has a "mask" is nice in group of people and really rude when it's just us two. This person does not want friends to think they are rude but,does not like me much I guess. I think many people will do this because we all have people we like and want to like us, and people who we just don't like.

Kalyn K said...

I know a person who “wears a mask.” When we go out with the rest of our friends, we become insane and hyper. But when it’s just the two of us and at her house she becomes very quiet and keeps to herself until her parents leave. Then she is back to being her self.
The reason I think she changes her personality in front of her parents is because they think she’s a perfect angel who never gets loud and she doesn’t want them to know how she really is. Because she fears getting in trouble she doesn’t want her parents to know who she truly is.
Why not be yourself all the time? If you have the personality that is crazy and out there then it isn’t appropriate at all times, which prevents you to be yourself all the time.

kennaw said...

I do agree with Catherine in everything she said. I have a few friends that are one way around me and different around other people. One person even admitted that to me. I think people just get caught up in trying to be one of the coolest people in high school. They want everyone to like them just like Catherine said. I also think that maybe sometimes people want to fit in with a group of people instead of being exclude so they feel like they have to act a certain way in order to do that. So it's true that friends do wear "masks" in order to impress a certain person or group of people, or even to just make themselves happy. Hopefully overtime they realize being themselves is really all they need to be liked by their friends.

sabrinad said...

I do know many people who wear a mask, but moree importantly I think that all of us have at one point worn a mask, whether we want to admit it or not it is true. Evrybody wants to "fit" in and this can lead to drastic changes inside of us all.

OliviaO said...

I know many people that have two faces but sometimes I think people wear these masks because they dont know how other will react to their real slefs. One person I know who is totally different when we are out with friends is very close to me. When she is with me she will totally be herself, in all her goofy un-edited glory. When we are out with friends though, she changes and becomes more serious and mature. It makes me sad that I am the only one who gets to see her in her funny stage but I dont think there is anything I can do. JUst embrace yourself the way you are and others will do the same.

erinp said...

I do know people that wear masks. Most of my friends are very different in school then they are outside of school. Like if they don't have any close or best friends in one of their classes, they don't really talk and try and meet new people. I think they maybe only feel comfortable around people they know well and don't want to open up. But when we are all together it gets pretty crazy and we have tons of fun. So I think they wear that shy mask because they are uncomfortable and just get kinda scared about what people will think.

ashleyG said...

I personally know many people who wear different masks at different times. This does not mean it is a bad thing because the masks people wear around me are not mean, just different from how they are around a group of people. Kids I know with different masks/personalities are usually loud and funny around a group but quiet and kind when it’s just the two of us. A lot of people feel the need to wear these different masks because when it is just one person and you there is no pressure and no need to impress anyone. When people are in a group everyone wants to stand out and be funnier or louder than one another, so there is more “competition” for who is the most fun to be around. It is not always a matter of “being you” or “not being you”, but choosing which personality to have in different situations.

jeffreys said...

I have one friend that I can think of who wears a mask. He lives kinda far away so I don't see him a lot. We are great friends and we when we do see each other we have a great time. A few months ago he had a couple of friends over for his birthday and most of them were from his school. He seemed to talk to and joke with them more than he did with me. I think this might have been because he is with them more often and he knows what they like to talk about.

Caryn S said...

I'm kind of ashamed to say it, but I can't help but think I put on a mask sometimes. At home I think I act completely myself, because I know my family will love me no matter what I do. I have some friends that I am almost myself with, but I still am afraid of losing them. I think I am more afraid I'll hurt them than I am afraid of embarrassing myself. I'm a little more self-conscious around my friends that aren't very close to me. That's mainly because I don't know how they would react to me doing something stupid and if I would like that reaction.

Tasha P said...

I have two friends who are really cool, they love to have fun, they are a little crazy, but they are really fun to hang out with seperately. But when they're around each other, they act like no one else is around them, and they do all these crazy things, they sing stupid made up songs in silly tones, silly things like that can be funny at first, but after a while it gets really annoying, and whenever they're together they don't act their age; they have all of these inside jokes that get brought up by a single common word like cheese or pickle, and then they'd burst out laughing, and everyone isn't even sure that its an actual inside joke or just them being obnoxiously crazy. I like them both, they're really good friends, but around each other they act totally different and immature, and they seem like they're out of control. I respect that thats their way of friendship, and that they can act however they want to, even if it means like 4 year olds, but they both act SO different when they're not around each other. Everyone I know of who is friends with them has said something about their "masks around other people"; they act like the rest of us do when they're not together, but one time I even heard one of the crazy friends say that her true self is when she's around the other crazy friend, and everywhere else she's a fake. I'm not sure if she was being entirely truthful, but it was very shocking to everyone.

CatherineD said...

I have this friend who we are really close, we know practically everything about each other. But, we have different groups of friends. When ever he gets around those people he acts like a total jerk to me. Then when school is out and his friends are not around he is the nicest guy. Sometimes I think he acts like that is because I'm so different form his friends. He doesn't want his reputation tarnished. I don't know why he can't be himself all the time.

shannanp said...

ONe of my very close friends is actually like that. When she is just with me or a couple of good friends, she's so fun and outgoing. Whanh we get around big groups, she acts very quiet and weird. I thinkt hat the mask is a sign of immaturity or not wanting to grow up because that would lead to change. I don't think she wants things to change just yet.

emilyh said...

I know people who use friends as their "mask". For example they are friends with totally different people after school then they are with the friends they are with at school. This seems bizarre to me because they don't even acknowledge that the people who they are best friends with after school exist when they are at school. They act differently around the friends they are with at school than they do with the person they see after school. I guess this could be because they are wearing a "mask" when they are at school with their other friends. I think some people use freinds as "masks" to use them so they can be two different people or to boost their reputation. However they could just want a larger varitey in the personality types of their friends. In our society it seems that who you are friends with can overpower what people think of you as individual

jordans said...

I know a girl who is not only fake, not only 2-faced, but is a diferent person to every individual she meets. Me and her got really close last year and one thing lead to another and she changed, she becomes trashy, lies, pretends, cheats, or fakes her own personality because she thinks it makes her more appealing and she thinks it makes people want her or want to be her. She used to amazing and i lover her well teh real her, the real her exists only when me and her alone. In some ways i changed her and i regret doing so because i miss her even when she is right next to me. Once somone changes there is little to no hope they will change back, i am not a fan of any kind of change and I am not a fan of my "new" old friend.

hbishop said...

I have a friend who is completely different when she is around me, and when she is around her friend. When she is around me, she is really nice, we laugh alot together, and we both just have a blast! But when I'm around, and she is with her friends, she turns into a totally differnet person. She doen't even pay any attention to me. When I try to get into conversation with her and her friends, she just tries to but me out. It gets really dumb after a while.

rachelseverson said...

One of my good friends from middle school had different personalities, depending on who she was hanging out with. When it was just me and her, she was really crazy and funny, but in a group she became really quiet and serious. It made me sad that so few people got to know the real her, who was really fun to hang out with. Instead she was known as the quiet girl in the background. I tried to talk to her about it once, and she did admit to acting different when we were in big groups. I think she was nervous to let her true personality show because she was afraid that people wouldn't like her because of it.

lluke said...

Sometimes, I feel like so many people hide behind different "faces". When I am hanging around them, I find myself wondering who they really are. I know one guy in particular that can be so sweet and nice around some people, and then turn around and be rude and hurtful as soon as he's with another group of people. I wish he would quit trying to put on a "face" and just be the nice person that's inside of him. I believe putting on "faces" is a sign of insecurity and hurting in a human being. There is so much pressure to fit into a certain mold! When people don't feel like they are good anough they tend to try and become someone they aren't. You may think they are just fine, but inside they may be deeply hurting. That is why it is so important to be kind to everyone, because you can never tell what is really going on behind a person's "face".

mollyd said...

One of my really good friends acts different around me and others than when around her parents. When she is with us she gossips and uses bad language. However when we are at her house she never says anything bad and acts all innocent. That is just one example, but I know a lot of people who act different around others just to try to fit in, but they are all perfect for their parents. A matter a fact I think everyone has put on a mask at some point. When you meet someone for the first time you usually are not yourself until you get to know them. People also change when they are trying to impress someone. Most people say they hate people who act different, but I am sure we have all done it at least once in our life.

AustinD said...

I am not aware of anyone who does that; everyone acts the same around me as in public. However, I believe this happens because people always worry what others think about them. People feel who they are as a person is different from the mold of society will act less authentic if they feel they will be more likely to be accepted by their peers.

Jacque said...

I believe everyone wears a mask at one time or another. One of my closest friends “wears a mask” per say. She’s extremely crazy and hyper around me yet in public she is the calm, well-behaved type. I believe a mask such as this is appropriate and necessary. If everyone constantly revealed the inner craziness which I believe inevitably exists within all people, then nothing would ever be accomplished. If no one was ever serious, society would be unable to function. However, I have another friend who is friendly and amiable around me, yet snotty and "slutty" in front of boys and more popular girls. This drastic change is an example of a mask which is truly changing who that person is. The mask she wears in an attempt to “fit in” with truly vapid people has resulted in her losing almost every real friend she ever had.

Coled said...

Some people use masks in public, although there are many reasons for doing so. Sometimes it's just to fit in and prevent people from judging them harshly. Other times they do it to try and become more popular. People that I know well that use masks are very noticable when their personality changes, and although it does bother me, I know that everyone does it. My friends and I are pretty weird though, and we're ok with it, so we usually don't care what people say about us.

MattN said...

Phoney Faces are all around us all the time. Many of my friends and people I know wear masks when they are with different people. They act one way when they are around you and then with a seperate group of people they act totally different. In public many people usually act reserved or shy so people don't think things about them even though that isn't their real self. Once in private and in company of friends again the become crazy or talkative again. I agree with Madison T when she says that many people don't act like themselves around popular people or people of the other sex just cause they like them and they don't want that other person to think they're weird even if that is their real self.

RayS said...

one person i know wears a "phony face" all the time. They always are cherful dorks around me but then with other people this "person" pretends to be big time jock who is the coolest person in the world. But thier not and i think they act like this in order to make friends with the "jocks" so he can be viewd as a cooler person and be accepted in to the socila group.

jasonk said...

In middleschool i knew someone that was always wearing two masks. Around a group of guys, he acted as though he was anything and everything. Around me though, he was kind, generous and didnt have a care in the world. Some people like to have a second mask on because they think that other people wont like them for what they are. This helps people cope with that insecure feeling, but yet at the same time, it makes them seem as though they are not all of a friend you thought they were.

helenp said...

A lot of people put up facades around others. Sometimes it is because they want to be accepted and impress people. Othertimes a person can be reserved around people because they are in an unfamiliar or uncomfortable social situation. I can understand being reserved around people you don't know, but I hate it when people change to be accepted. In middle school I knew some girls who would act all nice to your face but trash you behind your back just to fit in with their friends. I hate it when people do that, but it bothers me even more when girls would insult someone to their face. Maybe it gave the girl's friends a laugh; if so its not worth being friends with those kinds of people.

marissas said...

I do know some people who wear a mask but there is one who stands out most to me. She has many different personalities. Sometimes she is pretty nice to me and we have fun hanging out together but other times she puts me down. She also ignores me and acts weird around me when she hangs around the more popular kids. It is almost like she is embarassed to be around me. She just wants to seem "cool". This is a very annoying character trait. I think that true friends would act the same around everyone and never be embarassed to be around you. Just be yourself!!!

RLangas said...

In middle school I knew a person who is extremely two faced. Around adults and teachers she was the ideal student always listening and practically perfect. When she was around me and my friends Connor and Chris she was a totally different person. She would break the rules and act stupid all for attention. When she was around chris she would always agree with him even though she really did not which is so annoying. People just be yourselfes!

Alexm said...

The person seems to talk to me more when he is around only me but when we get around everyone else he excludes me. This is because he thinks that I'm not as cool as he is and I don't deserve to talk to them. He wants to seem cooler to everybody else, he wants to improve his image in everybody elses eyes. He wants to be liked by everybody.

stephanief said...

I know a few people who wear two masks.One of them for example, around me she is a lot of fun and is really nice. Sometimes around other people though she is a completly different person. It's like being friends with two different people sometimes. I think she acts this way because I have known her for a long time so she shows her true self to me. When she's around other people that she wants to be friends with she doesn't act like herself. It's like she is pretending to be someone different and I don't think she should do that. You need to show your true self around everyone so in the end you have true friends and not people who you say are your friends but they really don't know the true you.

AlyssaC said...

I know a lot of people who change around different people, and it usually doesn't bother me, but there are a few people that when they put that mask on, it really bothers me. But this is only with a few of my really close friends, and they change when they're with other people, or when they're around guys they change. And sometimes you can't help but think if when they're around you, that they're wearing the mask. But i know that everyone does it, and i know that i do it sometimes without realizing it. And i think that people wear maskes, because they think that it makes them more appealing to people, or that people will notice them or like them if they're one way, and not like the real them.

evand said...

I think that everyone wears a mask sometimes. People do this to either fit in or stand out.

matta said...

I thought of a time when Seth Donegan wears a mask. When he's on the phone. He talks in an extra deep voice and is very serious sounding. That is all.

KelsieL said...

I think the only real reason people wear masks is because they think someone won't like them for who they really are but if they put a mask on then it'll be okay and they will like me then. I have a lot of friends who act like one person to me, but when we are around a lot of people they act totally different. I think we judge eachother very harshly for doing this, but I also think we are all guilty of it. We all have times where we don't feel very confident in ourselves being good enough so we put on a mask and hide behind fake confidence thinking that will do, but that's definately not true, so all I have to say is be yourself and things will work themselves out.

kelseyl said...

One of my friends used to act differently or change while she was around other people. When she was with me or our other friends she is very open and funny and she tells us stuff that she thinks is really cool or stuff that she likes. Then when she is around other people she would change I think to be accepted by those people and to have them like her, and she would say that she didn't like something that they didn't like when before she had told us that she had. I think that she changed or put on a mask so that the other people would like her and think that she was like them and liked the stuff that they liked.